How to accept a workaholic husband
Every day, your man leaves the house filled with plans for the day. These are not plans based on family and home responsibilities. These are work plans. No matter what the weather, out he steps at the crack of dawn to fulfill his obligation to work. It’s hard for a wife and family to live with a workaholic. They go out to work, they come home and lay out their work on the table, and the never ending work ethos seems to invade the home. So how do you live with someone who is a workaholic? What can be done to improve your situation? This guide helps you see things in better perspective and help them and yourself to find a balance.
Deciding why your man work extra hours.
When you met your husband, was he a workaholic? What caused him to become one? Was this financial trouble? Was the reason simply because this is how your man is? You need to decide why your man works so hard. Often there are underlying reasons why a man works in this manner. Once you find these, you can understand better how much he needs his work for his own wellbeing.
Deciding how to arrange your life around his work.
When you marry, you accept the kind of person your loved one is. Part of the problem with a workaholic is that you don’t realize the impact this may have on family life. Many wives believe that their man will change with time though the workaholic mind doesn’t work like that. To them, they feel they are doing the very best that they can, and will put work as a high priority in their lives. It’s vital to arrange your life to maximize that time which you do have with them, so that they enjoy coming home. Often nagging wives make the workaholic enjoy work more than their home life. Look at your situation and try to arrange family life so that they get maximum benefit of it while they are at home. It may feel like you are very alone, though once they realize that life at home can be pleasurable and rewarding and that they are appreciated, they may just surprise you and spend more time there.
If you think that your workaholic husband is missing out on the children growing up, be sure to show him pictures of the children’s achievements. Don’t nag them. Let them spend more quality time with the kids. Encourage them, for example, to take on some of the roles you have which bond parents to children. Try and arrange mealtimes together and let him tuck the children into bed at night. You never know. They may actually learn from spending time with the kids how important it is to free up more time.
Sharing financial burden.
If your man is a workaholic to keep food on the table and pay the bills, look at ways you can cut back. If the outgoings are more than the income, then chances are he feels obliged to work. Perhaps you can take a part time job from home. Perhaps you can contribute something which allows him a little more time off. Share the load and try and find solutions which help him to have less of an obligation and weight around his neck.
Watch out for his health.
What many people who live with workaholics are shocked by is when health catches up with their partners. The stress related with workaholism can cause heart attack, stroke, ulcers and other related illnesses. If you see this as being a threat, be sure to talk this over with your partner. Perhaps you know people this has happened to. Without nagging, let them know how hard life would be without them, and let them make their own decisions. Encourage healthy pursuits in free time. Walk together, watch TV together, but most of all help them to have sufficient relaxation time. Nagging exaggerates the problem and causes resentment which in turn adds to their stress.
If you can’t beat them, join them.
Often a demonstration of workaholism helps. When they work, insist that you do too. Let them see the strain this puts upon life. Often a mirrored image of what is happening helps them to gain better perspective. If you can leave tasks and do them when they work at home, they will see that you aren’t just sitting around grumbling. Ask for their help. Let them see that being at home alone for all the hours they work makes your load greater, without nagging them. Let them actually observe that you are working your socks off to keep up with what you need to do. Once they see this, they may just decide on their own that they need to help more. The incentive here is that the workaholic recognizes hard work when they see it and will want to help.
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