How to identify an online sweetheart scammer

How to identify an online sweetheart scammer

The following article outlines what to look for when trying to identify a sweetheart scammer, both for my benefit, and that of others. This comes after having had 4 scammers in a row try to contact me via Online Dating Websites. While these are not gender specific though, of course written from a female perspective.


Posts a picture of someone who is not him. Usually a very good looking man…someone women would dream about having in their lives. I am guessing they probably acquired these pictures from another dating site or from somebody’s personal website.

*They say the right things

These guys are charmers. They come on with sweet talk, telling you how pretty/beautiful/cute/great smile/insert compliment of choice here…trying to quickly win your trust in order to defraud you. He’ll always comes up with the line of "I feel very good about you", "I have never felt this way about anyone else", and other charming lies. He quickly brings up marriage, and a desire to be with you forever. He’ll want to be exclusive very quickly. Again, he is trying to charm you with what he thinks you want to hear, in order to endear himself to you and make it less suspicious when he hits you up for money or financial information. The only thing he feels very good about is scamming you out of your hard earned dollars.

*The vulnerability touch

Always has a sob story about what happened to their ex and/or their parents. (In my case, one’s wife allegedly died in Hurricane Katrina, another said he found his wife in bed with his best friend, and the most recent claimed his ex was a drug addict.) None of this has happened, he is trying to play on the sympathies of women, who naturally want to help and heal their wounds.

*One way street

He will want to see you on webcam, but will have none of his own, and make up some excuse as to why his is inoperable, is not compatible with his laptop, etc.


Claims he has a vast amount of money, and does not need yours. He does business overseas, and winds up needing your financial information. Since he is doing this business for you, you two will be able to travel the world together. Trust me , the only person he will be traveling with is himself.

*Man of your dreams

He will make himself into anything you want him to be in order to be the "man of your dreams".

*What they sound like

English is usually not their first language, or they have a very thick accent. While this is not always the case, the ones I have run across have fit this description and always have an excuse, such as, "Yeah, I know, the voice does not fit the face." (Mind you, this was an allegedly 5’11" white male who sounded like a 6’4" Jamaican black man.)


You are not able to locate him on US

*Too good to be true

Lastly, if someone seems to good to be true, he probably is.

I hope this helps any ladies out there on Internet dating sites avoid the heartache and headache of losing their heart and/or their money.


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