How to ask someone on a date
Not all, but a lot of relationships start out with one person asking the other for a date. It might be the girl asking the guy, but it’s usually the other way around. In either case, it’s generally easier if the person who is doing the asking is forthright, clear, personable and confidant about what they are doing. Also, it’s generally a good thing if the person asking does some thinking ahead about the rules of convention and has ideas already in mind for a date, should their target say yes.
If you want to ask someone out, all you have to do is follow some simple steps, it generally makes things easier for both people, as there is less room for misunderstandings.
Pick your target
In order to ask someone out on a date, you first have to have someone in mind. Thus, you need to look around you and see who you think you might enjoy dating. Be realistic though, because you don’t want to choose someone that will obviously shoot you down. Choose someone that is near you in age, that you have reason to believe is single, and that looks like they might be someone who might say yes if you ask them out.
When picking your target, try to avoid only considering people you think look really good. You might find you’d enjoy a date more if you actually like the person.
Choose the right time and place
When asking someone out, it’s best to carefully consider both the timing and the place. You don’t want to ask someone out who is rushing somewhere else, for example, nor do you want to ask someone who is engaged in conversation with another person. Try to get them when they are alone and when they don’t seem to be engaged in something else. Also, if they look somewhat relaxed, and possibly in a good mood that might make things go better for both of you also.
When you’re ready to ask your target out, be sure to look around you and note what is going on. It’s easy to get so wrapped up in your plan that you forget to pay attention to things that might make it a bad time to ask someone to go out with you.
When the time comes to actually ask the other person out, don’t let your nerves get the best of you. Pump up your confidence and be direct. Wait till the coast is clear and then make your move. Walk towards them with a sense of purpose. Don’t hesitate or look around you. Look at your target. This will keep your mind focused on your mission and will alert the person that you are indeed heading over to speak to them. If they wait for you to arrive, that’s a good sign, if not, you may want to reconsider your target.
When you’re ready to ask someone out, don’t fool around; get yourself over there and get to it.
This is the part where the tire meets the road, or boy meets girl if you will. Once you’ve approached your target, walk right up to him or her. Again, don’t hedge or act uncertain. Say a word or two in greeting, give them your name, tell them what it is about them that has caused you to choose them as a target, and then ask them out. No fooling around, no hedging, no long pauses. Just ask, and then wait for your answer.
If the person says yes, thank them and then set up a definite time and place. If they say no, thank them for listening and then walk away.
When you ask someone out on a date, don’t try to act as if it’s not something that is important to you, otherwise they’ll treat the request as such.